WreckedMom

Sometimes, I really struggle to stay neutral instead of freaking out about the little inconveniences in life. I think the lifelong battle with depression has something to do with that, but the point is that I tend to see the crummy circumstances rather than the silver lining. However, my oldest is almost the total opposite of me in this area. She manages to find the good in so many things. She has a condition that causes tumors and though it's been hard, she takes it in stride. I remember that, when she was really little, I was trying to prepare her for the MRI. The conversation went something like this: "Remember, you're going to be poked in the arm and have to drink that really yucky drink. And you can't eat or drink the night before so you're gonna be really hungry and thirsty." "OK, Mommy. But can I ask you something?" (Holding back tears as I think of how hard MRI days are) "Go ahead, sweetie." "Is that the place that ha...

Have you guys ever had that kind of day, or is it just me? I'm having one of those days right now. I have never found a good solution to this feeling. Usually, I handle it by being secretly (or not-so-secretly) grumpy about all the things I have to do in a day, and the inconvenience of needing to do them when I'm either not in the mood or not feeling great physically. I didn't want to get up today. Didn't want to wake up early, just to take the kids to school and deal with the social awkwardness of interacting with other moms who are too busy to really talk anyway. I didn't want to face the mom who dragged me into a booster club meeting, just to be one of the last to show up. I don't want to drive 20 minutes, using gas money we don't have, to go to a school where I can't volunteer in my kids' classes anyway because I have my youngest with me, and I don't want to be forced to walk around a shopping center looking at things we can't afford, j...

Before the year even started, I was knocked off-kilter by an announcement from my pastor of 20+ years, that he felt led to leave our church in order to help out at his late father-in-law's church. Shortly afterward, he called me into his office to ask if I was willing to step into a youth leader role. I'd always wanted to be a youth pastor and even though I'd have to do it without him there, it was an answer to a calling that was placed in my heart as a teenager. I was so thankful for the time I had with those teens, despite the ups and downs that were happening at the church itself. A new pastor was selected, and I felt the process was hurried (even though we'd been almost 8 months without a pastor). We were given only one option and I thought this didn't seem very fair to the church, but I hoped for the best. Without going into detail, after meeting the senior pastor and spending some time talking with him, my husband and I made the very painful decision to leave ...